30-Day Blog Challenge: Day Four

Day FOUR

A DIY tutorial or something you’d like to make.

So, I’m choosing the DIY tutorial option.

How to change a stinky diaper.

Step one:
Find a stable surface, preferably a changing table, to lie stinky child on. Lie stinky child on stable surface.

Step two:
Remove all clothing from stinky child that has any slight potential of becoming contaminated by stinky contents within diaper.

Step three:
Shove cotton balls in nose.

Step four:
Place safety goggles over eyes.

Step five:
You’re going to need latex (or non-latex if allergic) gloves.

Step six:
Lift stinky child’s legs. Remember to keep feet from becoming contaminated by stinky contents. Undo stinky diaper.

Step seven:
Gaze in awe of the massive amount of stinky contents that came from said small child.

Step eight:
Have half a box of wipes prepared to begin cleaning stinky contents from stinky child’s bottom. Begin the wiping process…

Step nine:
(5 minutes later)
Place contaminated wipes inside stinky diaper. Roll the diaper from front to back with stinky contaminated wipes and stinky contents inside. Secure stinky diaper roll with Velcro tabs.

Step ten:
With child’s legs still lifted, place clean, non-contaminated diaper on child’s bottom. Secure with Velcro tabs around the now non-stinky child.

Step eleven:
Dress the child. Place child in safe place where no risk of rolling off onto the floor is a possibility (i.e. crib, swing, etc.)

Step twelve:
Place stinky diaper roll in plastic bag (or Diaper Genie, which is AMAZING). Take stinky diaper to an OUTDOOR garbage container (a dumpster would be best). Discard self of stinky diaper roll (still in plastic bag) inside the OUTDOOR garbage container. You should also remove stinky contaminated gloves at this time and discard in OUTDOOR garbage container.

Step thirteen:
Once inside house, disinfect child’s stinky room of stinky vapors. Wash hands. THOROUGHLY.

Step fourteen:
Remove safety goggles and cotton balls.

Step fifteen:

Congratulate yourself on another successful diaper change. Now resume enjoyment of child.

Note**
If child is male, place wipe or clean, non-contaminated diaper over wee-wee. Or risk potential surprise spring.

If child is female, make sure to clean extra throughly.
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